Friday, March 16, 2007


A long time ago, we were young and poor. Our darling son was 2 years old. We moved to a very tiny apartment in New York. One set of grandparents donated a small, used television set and a used play-only VCR. The other set of grandparents donated a single new VCR tape:

To say that my son watched this tape a lot doesn't quite cover it. He watched it every day. Every single day. Many times every single day. Over and over and over and over and over. This was the only video tape in the house for over a year, and we had no television reception. It was Land Before Time or nothing. I always chose 'nothing', but the darling little boy ususally chose LBT. By late afternoon, either Littlefoot and his friends had to take a nap on top of the refrigerator out of the reach of toddler hands or mommy would institute the 'cocktail hour'. We chose naps for Littlefoot.

After a year or so, the local library started carrying VCR tapes and the last of my sanity was spared. But this movie had already done it's damage. I can still hear, "Petrie, do not feel sad. It is alright. Many things cannot fly. Rocks, trees, sticks, Spike... " (one of our cats is named Spike and he also cannot fly), "Mother present. Very important.", " I fly? No, you falled." and other inspiring dialogue.

There are now over 842 sequels to this great movie. Our home is a LBT-Free Zone and my children are forbidden from watching any of those movies where there is even a remote possibility of my hearing them. Since my kids are 16 and 20, it's not an undue burden on them. The rest of the world, however, refuses to cooperate.

I'm haunted by the Land Before Time. If I go to get my oil changed and there's a tv in the waiting room, there's a good chance the LBT is playing. Same with doctor's offices. Once, it was even playing in the quilt shop!!!! We walked into Best Buy one time and it was playing on every television in the store! Dear Lord, make it stop! I've seen LBT on the screen in the minivan next to me when I'm running errands. The Land Before Time is like dog poo --- it's EVERYWHERE!

This week, I was once again attacked by the Land Before Time. The only show I watch is American Idol. Ok, so we also get Australian Idol off the computer, but it's kinda the same thing. This week on American Idol was Diana Ross week. I was enjoying my weekly dose of mindless entertainment when BAM! Jordin sang If We Hold On Together, sung in the Land Before Time by Diana Ross. The horror!

The next night of American Idol was ruined for me when I realized I'd have to listen to Sanjaya sing again next week. But that's another post.

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