To the young woman who just called me at 12:35 am, 12:37 am, 12:44 am, and 12:56 am:
No, I did not just call you.
Yes, I am sure.
No, really, I am sure.
No, I am not Kelly.
Yes, I do know someone named Kelly but I am not her. Really.
No, there is not someone, like, "younger" in the house.
To my blog readers:
This is why I am awake at 1:45 am googling "how to fall asleep.".
Answer number three looks promising: drink a relaxing beverage.